Selfishness
by Baueros
Summary: Gajeel wants what he believes he can't have, Levy wants what she believes she will never have, in the end they're both selfish, and thats just fine. GaLe. one-shot drabble.


**Hi guys, Baueros here with a new story. For those of you who have read my other stories I apologise dearly for not updating in over a year now. I've had a severe writers block on top of a huge amount of coursework (for a maths degree) been teaching at my local high school voluntarily and working on the internet radio Daemon Radio which is where all my time has gone.**

**I know crap reasons please don't hurt me. So in the end after reading several other Fairy Tail fanfics I had the idea for this and wrote it before it went again. I'm going to go over my other fics and see if I can get back into them as I have no intention of leaving them unfinished.**

**And before I blather too much, on with the story.**

**Disclaimer: I own my brain and the hands used to type this, that's it. nothing else. (actually the netbook's mine as well)**

* * *

Selfishness.

"Just go over there and ask her." The black Exceed bugged. "It's clear to everyone that she likes you."

"Tch, you need your head examined cat." Fairy Tail's Iron Dragon Slayer said before munching on a piece of iron. "She doesn't like me. Not after what I've done, fears me maybe but there's no way she likes me."

"She likes you, she wouldn't have let you partner her in the S-class exam if she wasn't at least comfortable with you." Lily pointed out.

"… There's a difference between friendship and liking someone how you're implying." Gajeel said eventually.

"There is." Lily allowed, "However Miss McGarden likes you rather than simply seeing you as a friend. You said it yourself that the iron she made you had a heart in it."

Gajeel grumbled something.

"Sorry what was that?" Lily asked.

"I don't deserve her." Gajeel repeated gruffly before crossing his arms and turning his back on the Exceed signalling the discussion was over.

Lily sighed.

"In the end you're just hurting both of you." He muttered but Gajeel with his hearing heard him clearly.

Gajeel stood immediately sending the table flying.

"What do you know about it?" he hissed rounding on his cat, "It was before you joined and you know I don't like talking about my past."

"Gajeel I…" Lily began but he was cut off

"Why can't you just drop it and accept that it doesn't matter how much I want her. I don't deserve her and she certainly deserves better than me. She will never love me after what I did to her and its nothing but selfishness on my part to want her."

Before Lily could respond he turned and stormed out of the guild drawing more than a couple of glances.

* * *

"Just go over there and tell him." Lucy said to her friend noticing the bookworm once again had stopped paying attention to her and was watching the Iron Dragon slayer intently as he had a conversation with Lily.

"Lu-chan," Levy said aghast, "Keep your voice down, he might hear you."

"Well it's not like it's a secret. Everyone knows" Mira chimed in.

"Oh god, am I that obvious?" Levy moaned hitting her head into the bar.

"Well he hasn't caught on but that might be because he's so dense." Lucy said thoughtfully.

"Why would he like me anyway?" Levy asked no-one in particular, "I'm weak. Bookish and nerdy, I don't have big… assets like the rest of you. I'm just a hindrance, someone he protects as an excuse to try find an even fight. There is no way he'd like someone like me I'm sure he just sees me as a liability and weak spot in the guild like… like back then."

Lucy and Mira glanced at each other uncomfortable with where this conversation was going but were saved from answering when Gajeel stood abruptly sending a table flying before hissing something at Lily and all but fleeing the guild.

"What was all that about?" Lucy wondered.

"They were having an argument." Natsu said wandering over, "I didn't catch all of it but it was about you Levy, and Gajeel said something about being him being selfish."

"I told you he just sees me as a plaything." Levy all but yelled before tearing out of the guild herself.

* * *

"Damn cat, why can't he learn when to leave things alone?" Gajeel muttered to himself darkly while sat in a tree in magnolia park.

"Tch, no way she'd like me, how could she?" he mused.

A streak of blue caught his eye and he turned to see Levy running to sit curled up at the bottom of the tree he was perched in, oblivious to his presence.

"Baka, baka, baka, baka, baka." She said and Gajeel was surprised to hear she was crying, he was about to jump down and ask what was wrong when she continued making him hesitate.

"No way he'd like me, stupid Gajeel, always looking for a good fight and not caring for anyone or anything else." She said. "And even if he does like someone it won't be me. He'd want someone strong, not a weakling like me."

After that she degenerated into tears and muttering too quiet for even Gajeel's super human hearing to pick up.

"You're wrong." He said softly as he jumped down from the tree landing in front of her making her squeak in surprise. "You're not weak, I am." He said simply causing her to turn and face him in surprise.

"You said it yourself that I need to get stronger, during the S-class exam." Levy said sniffing. "And now you tell me you're the weak one?"

"There are many kinds of strength." Gajeel said. "How can you even stand to be around me after what I've done to you? Let alone be friendly towards me, I don't deserve it." He blurted suddenly.

"What?" was all Levy could manage before he cut her off.

"After everything I did to you how could you just forgive me like that? How are you able to treat me as an equal instead of the monster most would?" Gajeel kept on talking.

"It wasn't as easy as you make it out to be." Levy said.

"But why bother to begin with?" Gajeel asked. "I'm not worth the effort everyone thinks I am, in the end I'm just a selfish bastard who always wants that which he can't have."

"You changed." Levy said wiping the remaining tears off her face seeing how much Gajeel was beating himself up. "You're not who you were back then, you're a man who deserves great respect; you're the one who's there to protect me when I need it."

"Then why can't I forgive myself when everyone else has?" Gajeel asked so quietly she had to strain to hear it.

"Because you're a good man." Levy said. "You realise that you did something horrific but you could have done so much worse and part of you registered that at the time. The fact that you can't forgive yourself shows a strength of character and desire to change that is more than worthy of redemption." She said making him blush slightly though he'd never admit it later. "And I love you for that." She added so quietly he almost missed it.

"You… love me?" Gajeel said disbelief clear in his voice. "Then, Lily was…"

He chose that instead of finishing the sentence he would simply pick the bluenette up crashing his lips into hers. There was nothing tender about the way he kissed her, he was a man who had power and made it known in everything he did. Levy squeaked in response but quickly gave herself up to the kiss, returning it with a fiery passion that most would find hard to believe the small girl contained.

"So, what was Lily?" she questioned when they finally broke apart, breathlessly gasping for oxygen.

"Right" Gajeel answered simply as he lifted her off the ground completely and jumped back into the tree where he had been perched earlier carrying her with him.

* * *

They sat in companionable silence for a while, Levy leaning against Gajeels chest both of them feeling better than they had done in years.

"I still feel selfish though." Gajeel said eventually.

"Why?" Levy asked turning to look at him.

"Prettiest girl in the guild and I have no intention of ever letting you go." He said with a grin. "Poor guys won't have a chance now. I'm just selfish like that." He chuckled.

"We're both selfish then." Levy said, "Because I don't care if there's enough of you to go around, I'm claiming you completely." She blushed furiously realising that could mean more than she intended. "And I expect Jet and Droy to just deal with it as well. Surly that makes me more selfish."

Gajeel laughed at that. "This is really gonna be fun."

* * *

They settled back into silence watching the park around them until the sun began setting.

"Want to go back to the guild yet?" Levy asked.

"No." Gajeel said, "I want to stay here forever if we could but if we don't return soon they'll send a damn search party."

"They would at that." Levy said smiling, "We're going to argue when we get there though."

"What? Why?" Gajeel asked as he scooped her up to jump back down.

"So they don't realise we're dating yet." Levy responded with a smile. "I want to keep it secret for a bit, I guess I'm just selfish like that."

* * *

**So, what do you think? I hope you liked it and I'm proud of it even though it's probably not my best piece just because it's the first one i've ever finished proving to myself I can do it.**

**As I said before for thoes of you who read my other stories I still plan on finishing them but I'm gonna re-read them first to get back into the swing of it and remind myself where I was going with it all.**

**I also have a couple more GaLe fanfic idea's but I'm not sure anything is going to come of them at the moment so I wont say more.**

**Untill next time,**

**Baueros.**


End file.
